• Parenting with Hope

Help, My Teenager is Pulling Away

I hear from a few parents with the same concern- “Help, my child is pulling away….” While there are definitely serious moments and concerns, more often it a natural part of the development of your child into young adulthood.

This month’s Online Parenting Class, is a helpful short video guide to this normal transitional season in your tween’s/teen’s life.

I love the line “…we have to work hard to fight for their hearts….” While this is all part of the natural growing up experience, make sure you are not also pulling away. As their life-long discipler, you are still going to need to be a part of their lives and heart life. You are also in a new season of your parenting life. Listen again or think about the 4 helpful hints. Each one of them is a clear simple guide to this process.

I want to help you through this time, whenever it comes. Each family will hit this moment at different times. It is a balance; don’t force it to come, but also don’t fight it when it does come.

It is a concern and question we hear often as students move into these transitional years. There is a shift from being dependent on you to seeking more independence. It can be a scary time, especially if they are your first tween/teen in your home.

Questions to consider:

• How am I talking to my tween/teen? Has the way I talk to them changed based on their age, or do I still talk to them as if they are younger?

• What is the balance in your family of giving enough space without giving too much space? How have our family rules changed to help this balance?

As your teen gets older and grows up, it is a natural season of life to become independent of you. Navigate it well with them, and don’t pull away. Small changes on our parts as parents can help our parenting relationships so much. You will make it through this season and if you make some of these moves now you are laying a foundation for influence for years to come.

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